An On Wednesday morning, a former bachelor appeared Good morning America with a big announcement. “Obviously this year has been a lot for a lot of people,” Colton Underwood told host Robin Roberts. “And it probably made a lot of people look in the mirror and realize who they are and what they ran away from or what they put off in their lives.”
“I’m gay,” he said, “and I came to terms with it earlier this year and prosecuted him.”
Underwood has been facing rumors about his sexuality for years and it’s nice to see that the former bachelor has finally found a way to proudly live his truth. A number of celebrities and Bachelor alumni have already expressed support for Underwood. But the way ABC handled the interview was, at best, strange and, at worst, deeply irresponsible. In her rush to validate Underwood, Roberts essentially removed the temporary restraining order a judge granted to Underwood’s winning competitor, Cassie Randolph, last year.
In September last year, Randolph allegedly harassed and tracked her down, including placing a tracking device on the car and lurking outside the bedroom window at her parents’ home at 2 a.m. Randolph dropped the order. restriction in November, after the two reached a private agreement, and in a statement from that time, Underwood wrote, in part, “I don’t think Cassie did anything wrong in filing the restraining orders and also I think he acted in good faith. “
Roberts vaguely mentioned the temporary restraining order, after describing Randolph as “the woman [Underwood] he jumped the fence The Bachelor.He mentioned that “Cassie files and then waives a restraining order” against Underwood, but did not provide details about the allegations.
Instead, it was Underwood who had to characterize the disappearance of the relationship – and the way he described it, everything seems to be a standard breakup.
“I’d like to be sorry for how things ended,” Underwood said. “I messed up. I made a lot of bad choices.”
“Did you fall in love with Cassie?” Roberts asked.
“Yes,” said Underwood. “I mean, and that only made it harder and more confusing for me. To be honest, I liked everything about her and it’s hard for me to articulate exactly what my emotions were when I was going through that relationship, because obviously I had an internal struggle. ”
“I’d just say I’m sorry,” Underwood concluded, never giving information about what he was sorry about. “I am sorry for any pain and emotional stress I have caused. I wish it hadn’t happened the way it did. I wish I had been brave enough to work out before breaking up with someone else. ”
“I don’t think Cassie did anything wrong in placing the restraining orders, and I also think she acted in good faith.”
It is worth going into detail about the “emotional stress” that Underwood would have caused – because no matter how much we should empathize with the emotional turmoil that led Underwood to this self-actualization, there is no denying that The way he treated Randolph sounds really terrifying.
Randolph and Underwood broke up in May last year. As people reported in September last year, Randolph’s request for a restraining order claimed that Underwood “acknowledged several friends and co-workers that he had placed the tracker on [her] auto and used phone numbers aliases to send anonymous text messages to [Randolph], himself and others. ”
Randolph also claimed that Underwood sent both her and himself a text message claiming to be an anonymous stalker. She claimed that she took “obsessive” walks to her Los Angeles apartment, where she will appear unannounced, and that he also appeared uninvited at her parents’ house in Huntington Beach. people reports.
To minimize Underwood’s behavior or to explain it as the mere result of the struggle with his sexuality, he does a service to both women and strange people.
“Randolph also claimed that Underwood sent a text message to both her and himself, claiming to be an anonymous stalker. She claimed that she also took “obsessive” walks to her Los Angeles apartment, where she will appear unannounced, and that he also appeared uninvited at her parents’ house in Huntington Beach …”
Women are already facing an upward struggle to get the authorities to take harassment and harassment complaints seriously. Consider the tragic murder of Shana Grice – who reported police to her ex-boyfriend several times before her ex-boyfriend broke her neck and set her body on fire. (But only after police fined Grice £ 90 for wasting her time.) Or when Anita Sarkeesian, during the mess that was Gamergate, had to cancel a discussion at Utah State University after that the university received an e-mail threatening an act “worse than the deadliest school shooting” because the police refused to hit participants or use metal detectors to ensure the safety of all.
To characterize Underwood’s actions as just the result of emotional confusion is extremely irresponsible; a lot of weird people struggle to reconcile with their identities before going out, but most find a way to do so without the hassle of installing a tracking device on their ex’s car.
There is no doubt that Underwood’s personal journey was a difficult one. On GMA, described that he was in a “dark and bad” place.
“There was a time in LA when I woke up and I didn’t think I would wake up,” Underwood told Roberts. “I did not intend to wake up and so I did. And I think for me, that was my wake-up call, “This is your life. Take control back. “He described suicidal thoughts and driving my car near a rock like,” Oh, if that comes off the rock, it’s not such a big deal. “
“I don’t feel that anymore,” Underwood concluded, his voice broken.
Underwood’s emotional process was aggravated, in some respects, by being placed in the spotlight as the “virgin boy.” While fans speculated about Underwood’s sexuality during his season, Billy Eichner offered his own theory during his celebrity appearance on the Bachelor– eliminating the possibility of Underwood being the “first gay bachelor”.
“I was a virgin before [The Bachelor]and I could never give anyone a good enough answer to why I was a virgin, “said Underwood. “The truth is, I was a licensed virgin because I was gay and I didn’t know how to handle it.”
Now, Underwood said: “I am emotional, but I am emotional in such a good, happy, positive way. I am the happiest and healthiest in my life and that means the world to me “.
But no matter how wonderful it is for any strange person to find self-acceptance, going out should not allow anyone to avoid responsibility. Just as Hollywood did not allow Kevin Spacey to use the exit to avoid dealing with allegations of harassment, Underwood’s announcement should not protect him from taking responsibility for everything that happened to Randolph.
This is what makes Underwood’s interview so complicated. The candidacy with which he describes his journey is commendable and, as Roberts points out, will probably help gay young people like Underwood – especially young athletes who have relationships with the former footballer – embrace their own identities. Young gay Christians might also respond to Underwood’s candid description of how self-acceptance helped him feel more connected to a god he once prayed to do right. But praising Underwood while dismissing Randolph’s accusations doesn’t help anyone – especially since Underwood seems to be taking advantage of this moment as a new branding opportunity.
Roberts teased that more of her interview with Underwood would be aired Nightline“So maybe then, we’ll hear more details about why things happened to Randolph the way they did and whether Underwood managed to fix it.” But meanwhile, variety reports that Underwood would already have a Netflix reality show in the works “focusing on Underwood to live his public life as a gay man.”
A Netflix representative declined to confirm or comment on the show. Representatives for Underwood and Randolph did not immediately respond to The Daily Beast’s request for comment.