Parents could use additional support during the pandemic, both emotionally and logistically.
But fathers are more likely to say they need emotional support throughout the pandemic than mothers, according to a new survey by the American Psychological Association.
Overall, 75% of parents with children under the age of 18 said they could have used more emotional support, which includes having a friend, family member, or mental health professional you can turn to at the time. when you’re worried or upset, according to APA’s “Stress in America” report released Thursday.
Specifically, 82% of fathers said they needed more support than they had since the pandemic began, while only 68% of mothers surveyed said the same.
So what’s with this discrepancy?
For starters, a lot of research has shown that men tend to have smaller social networks than women, says Dr. Lynn Bufka, APA’s chief executive for the transformation and quality of practice, says CNBC Make It.
“A lot of social assistance for men and social connections generally come from work and their partners,” says Bufka.
With many people working remotely during the pandemic, there are fewer opportunities to interact with friends at work.
Women are also less available to their partners during this time because data suggests women took on more responsibilities during the pandemic, says Bufka.
In fact, a recent study of 31,141 people in five countries found that women, especially mothers, spent more time on “necessities” such as childcare and household chores during the pandemic than men.
Part of this has to do with how men and women are socialized to share “inside and outside” household roles, says Bufka. Other literature has shown that the person in a couple who is perceived as having a more flexible job tends to take on more responsibilities, she says. (It is unclear how many of the 3,000 American adults included in the APA survey, which was conducted in mid-February, are in same-sex or heterosexual couples.)
“When you put that together, you have men who were more likely to rely on their female partner, who has now taken on more responsibilities during the pandemic,” says Bufka. “Men also have less access to sources of support through work.”
On the other hand, mothers were more likely than fathers to say that their mental health had deteriorated compared to before the pandemic, according to the study. Nearly half of mothers (47%) who have children at home who do distance learning reported that their mental health deteriorated, while 30% of fathers with children at home said the same.
A separate survey published in December found that working mothers are 28% more likely to be exhausted than fathers.
Finally, being spread too thin has real-life consequences. With childcare and schools closed due to the pandemic, many women have been forced to leave their jobs due to increased demands at home. The total number of women leaving the workforce since the beginning of the pandemic reached over 2.3 million in January.
Bufka encourages people who are able to help (perhaps those who do not have small children at home) to lend a hand to their parents.
“You recognize that people who have young children who might struggle may not necessarily know that you are available to play outside with the children for a while,” she says.
For people with children, “really think: is there anyone who can support us? What would that look like? What would really make a difference? ” she suggests.
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