Shortstop Andrelton Simmons says depression and suicidal thoughts led to his decision to drop in the final week of the 2020 regular season in Los Angeles Angels, telling the Orange County Register that “the idea of ending the season in a balloon was too great for me to handle. “
Simmons, who recently completed a $ 10.5 million one-year contract with the Minnesota twins, chose to share his story in writing through a series of direct messages on Twitter, instead of verbal, because “it’s still difficult to articulate certain things or be open.”
The Angels announced on September 22 that Simmons had given up the last five games of the regular season. No further information was provided, although Simmons said in a statement that he considered it “the best decision for me and my family”. At that time, the Angels remained mathematically in the race for second wild card and second place in AL West. Although their chances of reaching the postseason were slim, the league’s rules required potential playoff teams to start quarantined that week in preparation for future playoff games.
“It was hard for me, mentally, as far as the thought of suicide went through my mind,” Simmons told the Registry. “It was something I swore a long time ago that I wouldn’t consider. I was lucky enough to talk to a therapist, which helped me give up those thoughts. In the end, when a lot of people were still going through which most people would think were just as hard, the idea of ending the season in a bubble was too big for me.
Simmons played in just 30 games during the short regular season, missing time due to an ankle he injured for the third consecutive summer. He told the Registry that it was difficult to focus on baseball when so many people were fighting in the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic.
“The first time I drove through Oakland I saw a few shops and restaurants trying to stay open with all the homeless people camping outside,” he said. “Then it really hit me.”
Simmons began communicating with a therapist, but his hesitations about entering a playoff ball persisted.
“I was really saddened by how much I heard about the number of deaths and saw smaller businesses go out of business and I was a little depressed about how the effects of all the new rules and fears would affect people’s lives and how disconnected people became.” , he said.
Simmons told the Registry that he did not come to terms with his reasons for giving up at the time “because I don’t like the idea of having to explain every detail of my life” and “he was afraid of people judging people.” to twist my story. “But he said he changed his mind when he realized that being open to his situation could help others who are struggling.
Information from ESPN’s Alden Gonzalez was used in this report.